Green Apron Tales-the freshest brew

August 10, 2008 at 7:47 am 2 comments

So, things have been pretty quiet in Green Apron land. Customers have been pretty-dare I say-normal. We’ve still got our share of freaks, like the guy who ordered a 6 shot cappucino…but that’s just par for the course. No one really stands out as being super oddball, at least in customer land. We’ve had some very nice people lately, including a local news anchor and his son, who is just absolutly hilarious. Kid comes in, and makes us totally laugh for the half hour they’re there, having a snack and drinks.


But, freaky people and insane stunts aren’t just related to customers…nope, not even close. Sometimes Baristas even get into the act. There’s one barista that has just taken the cake lately. It is at the point where everyone wants this to happen:

He came from another store (incidentally, one that’s closing, or as we heard yesterday, is in renegotiations, as we found out the rent is too high-that’s why they’re closing that one…but who the heck knows..), and we had all heard things about him, and everyone had their tales…but as always, I figured that I’d make my mind up about this guy when I finally worked with him…and oh, mama, am I ready to reinact that slap scene above.

Let’s just hit the high points, shall we?

  1. Guy is super obnoxious. There’s just no words to describe how really obnixious he is. He walks in and everyone cringes…and that’s after cringing after seeing his name on the schedule.
  2. He gets into verbal fights with customers. He nearly had one jump over the counter the other day and deck him after he started arguing about putting vanilla syrup into the coffee. For cripe’s sake-put the stinkin syrup into the coffee and MOVE ON!
  3. He’s LOUD. So loud that we all have to turn our headsets down when he’s got one on and is on DTR.
  4. He’s a know it all-and thinks he should be allowed to tell EVERYONE how to do their jobs. He tried to spend 10 minutes telling me how to organize my pitchers on bar. Umm. No. I have my way-leave me alone. (Really-everyone has their own way of doing bar. If someone asks, you politely give advice, but otherwise? No.)
  5. He throws temper tantrums. No, not kidding. Friday he threw a serious one at me because he didn’t hear the conversation with the shift, who asked me what I was waiting for…and when I told her, he lost it on me screaming that he couldn’t go faster. Umm…that’s not what I asked him to do. I answered a question from my supervisor…
  6. He is NOT a team player-he will not clock on before he is scheduled to, although he gets in super early and drives us insane from the cafe. We can be in the weeds, and need a person, and he can be there, and refuses to do anything to help us. He will NOT help anyone out even when he’s on shift. It’s quite annoying.
  7. He talks and talks and talks about things no one cares about. Who cares that you have the entire run of Quantum Leap on video tape. Umm. Not I.
  8. (and the worst of EVERYTHING) He DOES NOTHING. Nothing at all. He stands around, leaning on the counter. He won’t clean, he won’t do the tasks on the duty roster. If he’s on cafe, he won’t brew coffee or get brewed teas. If he’s on DTR-he barks for people to get him things, like pastries-and seriously, that’s not everyone else’s responsibility, considering if we’re in a rush, we’re up to our elbows all around. If one of us isn’t busy, we all will pitch in, but heck-normally, if you’re on DTR, you get your own pastires. If he’s on bar, he refuses (most times) to do cold bar and pour brewed coffee, or stock himself. He can have NOT ONE drink, but demand that we get him bananas (for the dang Vivanos…those things! ARGH! But that’s another thing for another day), lids or do whatever he beckons.  He heven had the NERVE to go to the manager the other day and tell him that we all do nothing and our priorites are not straight. Ummm…yeah, right.

So, when I told the assistant manager that I was through working with him, and that my tolerance factor had gone down to zero, and his mission, should he choose to accept it, was to keep me from slapping this guy…he said (and this is the honest truth..)

“I’m not going to get between you two. I’m going to get behind you! I want a turn!”

and then we discussed the slap scene. He thought that would be hilarious.

Me too.

and 99% of the rest of the partners too.


Entry filed under: green apron.

Hrm… Green Apron tales-the borrowed partner

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Florida Girl In Sydney  |  August 11, 2008 at 7:36 am

    I love you calling it the Green Apron Tales– hilarious.
    I hope you all force the obnoxious freak out to a new job– maybe working from home would suit him better?

  • 2. sjsmart  |  August 12, 2008 at 7:13 am

    If he’s that obnoxious and the management knows it why does he still have his job? Seems like you’d be better working with nothing, than paying someone to do nothing.


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