Doctors and patients and medical stuff, oh my!

July 2, 2009 at 8:12 pm Leave a comment

Does everyone remember a year and a half ago when I had the whole medical device fiasco? Well, the short version of the past year and a half is that this sucker is now malfunctioning. So, it has to come out. With this being me and my rotten luck (I swear-Eeyore mode is in full force!) I’ve got to go into the OR and have them pull it out. I was NOT going to let the doc go in and get it blindly. Not a chance.

So, they scheduled a surgery time for me. I got the phone call for the pre-op appointment and after scheduling it around some other things, I finally made it there on Friday. As per the way my life runs, nothing can be normal or smooth…

So, in walks this couple. They’re loud and the male of the two is kvetching about how he’s going to have to wait, and that there are all of these appointments ahead of him.

The female of the two is trying to calm the guy down. At this point, I figured they were father and daughter or uncle and niece. She begs him to eat the other half of his sandwich. Did I mention it’s 9:25 am?

So, he finally agrees and she hands him a half of a BLT with cheese and mayo. He sits there, eating it, slobbering all over the place. There was mayo everywhere! Then, he started loudly complaining how he waited 2 1/2 hours the day before and never got seen. Then he asked about vending machines in the building we were all in. Unfortunately, there’s really none of those, and we all told him so. Girlie offered him water, and he kvetched about the temperature of said water.

So, I get called back to do all sorts of things, like insurance verification and all of that, and when I came out, the entire room of people had moved away from this couple. Hrm…so, I settled with the rest of the waiting room.
One by one we all get called back for bloodwork and EKG stuff. In between each one, we were put into a seperate waiting room. In that secondary waiting room, I ran into two of the people from the waiting room who had moved away from the couple. This is what they told me…

“you missed it.”

I asked what, and the one proceeded to tell me that after I was called back, the couple started to make out. He started SLURPING ON HER EAR!!! Oh, for yuck, yuck yuck!

I couldn’t believe it. So, after I left that office, I figured I’d never hear or see that couple again. Until this morning. I arrived for my procedure on time (that’s a whole other ball of wax..but I’m not going there.) and as I’m getting settled into preop, I hear a voice. One I recognize…

OH MY FREAKIN HECK! It’s that couple! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! Thank goodness I was settled into my bed and was not visible to them. I was beyond OMG-ing. I quickly signaled to Doug that this was the BLT, ear slurping couple and he craned his neck to look. Hell, I would ahve too if I hadn’t seen this group. Haven’t seen them since. Thank goodness.

So, as I sat in my room, it became people watching central. The woman in the pre-op bed next to me was quite the entertainment factor. She spent the entire time she and her daughter were there talking about FOOD. OH, my god. Food. I then immersed myself in the laptop. Tossed on a DVD-and then got bored of that and went on the wifi.

During this time, they tried to insert an IV. I promise, there will be  no pictures of the aftermath of the IV debacle. The one nurse tries, misses. Second nurse tries, misses. They declare me a hard stick-Duh. They call the IV team who tried two more times and gave up. THEN, the anestesiologist came in and I told her she had one hit to get it, and if she didn’t I didn’t know what I was going to do.  She made 2 hits, so we’re up to 6 sticks, but  I had an IV, and I also had all sorts of bruises all over my hands and arms.

I spent the rest of the afternoon on the wifi, playing with the Pandora internet radio and basically wondering when the heck I’d be going down for the whole surgery thing.

Surgery was scheduled for 2:10, so about 2:45, I finally asked when I was going to be taken down…and they found out for me that it was going to be another 45 minutes to an hour before I got down there. Ick. Fine, blah. yuck. So, 3:30, I finally got down to the area before the operating room, and was there for about 30 minutes before everyone came and talked to me about it all. I met in quick succession, the resident, anestesiologist and an OR nurse. Oh, brother. How to really confuse me about who was going to be in there! eekers!

The anestesiologist dropped something down my IV, and wow! That sucker really knocked me on my ass. I remember being wheeled down to the OR, saying hi to Dr. C, and shifting to the surgical table. Then, it’s all black. Nothing. Nothing at all.

I woke up to the PACU (post anestesia care unit) nurse telling me to take deep breaths.  The first question out of my mouth was-Where am I?

Second question-Can you make the room stop spinning?

Did I mention that I don’t get along well with pretty much all types of sedation? I’ve got a really hard time waking up and I end up crying and all sorts of icky things. I let them know this, so they were ready with pain meds and phenegrin for the nausea that I always have.

But I finally got home late last night. Out of it as all get out, but home. So, I’m without said medical device and still kinda feeling gross. Not wanting to eat, and every once in a while, if I push myself a bit further than I should (that’s normal for me-I want to be back to myself NOW.) I feel woozy…

 

but at least I’m done and don’t have to worry about having something in me that’s not working like it should.

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Entry filed under: ick, ouchies.

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