Archive for August, 2009

why I don’t have an xbox

Thursday night, before I went to pick up the boys from their Arizona trip, I went over to  Blogless Renee’s house to geek out and play Rock Band. No, I don’t have it for my Wii, but she’s got it for the xbox 360.  And she’s got drums. Seriously. Drums. The last time I was over there, I made my own character-seriously red hair and all, and slammed out to Green Day and all sorts of other things.

(Interjection-21st Century Breakdown is the BEST Green Day album since Dookie. And yes, I have a special fondness for Dookie…but seriously. The new album rocks-and you can play it on Rock Band-21 Guns is a killer drum track…interjection over.)

We fire up the xbox and get the game in and Renee’s all loaded up, and I’m loading in…and the game freezes.


Renee and I reboot the system and see                    it.

the worst thing that you can see on an xbox-

The Red Ring of Death.

We both gasped in horror. serious horror.

I made a panicked phone call to the game store to confirm that there was nothing we could do-because this is her BOYFRIEND’S console. NOT hers, and we were both going to DIE.

So, Renee’s boyfriend walks in and looks at us…as we’re probably looking beyond guilty. Renee looks up and says: “I just tried to reboot it…”

Boyfriend notices the red ring of death and goes off the deep end.

I grab the computer and start peeking for fixes. I also jump on twitter…

Well, crap! @neanea18 and I just tried to play Rock Band on the x box and got the stupid ass red ring of death. *!@*#$%#@! Dumb Microsoft!7:58 PM Aug 27th from web

Yeah, seriously. We were both NOT happy about this. Definately not happy.

So we gave up on the xbox, with boyfriend saying “Man, crappy night all around. Both of my teams are losing, and I’ve lost my lover-Not you, Renee, my xbox!”

And with that we moved over to the wii…and this is what happened…

Umm. I think we now need a battery run. Stupid ass batteries. Stupid ass xbox. Stupid ass microsoft.8:00 PM Aug 27th from web

And then this:

ok. the wiimote lives. No, it’s not.8:01 PM Aug 27th from web

and the final insult…

Fine. we give up. We’re going for ice cream and batteries. Video games NOT in the cards tonight!!8:02 PM Aug 27th from web

All of this drama equals why I don’t have an xbox, and I use a Mac. Seriously. No one needs this kind of a headache. Seriously. We ended up at Stewart’s and then at CVS to get batteries for the wii. It was all we could do. Then, we played wii Tennis. So there.

Stupid Microsoft. Stupid xbox.


August 31, 2009 at 1:57 pm Leave a comment

Announcements from the peanut gallery that make me twitch

Isaac is a one of a kind kid-to the point where it causes me to say the kid is just oddball. One of the things he does is announce what he wants to do or us to get him involved in. Prime example-

Before he went to Arizona to visit the outlaws with Doug, he announced that he wanted to play soccer.

Yeah. Ok. After the last trial of soccer, I wasn’t too sure. He was targeted by 2 kids and one actually threw a ball in his face. Literally. Hit him in the face with a ball. the instructor and parent did NOTHING. Yeah. I wasn’t sure. BUT, I’m not one to tell him he can’t do something.

So, I began hunting for places other than the one to play fall soccer at. I found one in a neighboring city, but even though that’s close to Mom and Dad’s house and where I work, I’d rather have Isaac play with kids in the neighborhood. Isn’t that half the reason you play sports? To get to know the kids around you and play with your friends?

So, I went and found a local soccer club that he could play on, but it turned out it was waaay too expensive-and was a TRAVEL CLUB. Not for first timers. I don’t understand what parent would put their 5 or 6 year old on a travel club that costs that much and is that much pressure with tryouts, ect. Not my idea of what beginning sports should be like, but I digress.

The expensive travel club emailed me back (because I emailed them about financial assistance-I really can’t afford $300.00 for my 5 year old to play soccer!) and suggested I look into the town rec league.

Hrm. Didn’t know the town had a rec league.
I got on line and looked it up, and made the phone call to the appropriate person, and asked about a million questions…and found out that we still had time to register! WOOHOO!

After PT the following day, I shot over to the town offices and got everything all locked and loaded. I got the email receipt and there was a note on the bottom that said:
“all players must wear shin guards. Cleats are reccomended but not required.”

I hadn’t thought of that.

How in the name of all things holy are we going to get ones that fit over AFO’s? How in the name of all things holy are we going to get cleats that aren’t too long and can take the bulk of a shin guard and sock and AFO?

Yeah, No clue here. So, I called the town person and played 20 questions about where to get the stuff. She reccomended Play it again Sports-deals in new and used equipment, because with the cleats, little kids wear them one season and then they need new ones because their feet grow! Why pay all of that money for cleats when you can get them in realllly good condition and on the cheap?

I’m with that.

I called Play it Again, and played 20 questions with them about cleats, AFOs and shin guards. I then went in after work and got the cleats and shin guards (with the AFO’s to make sure they fit…because for some reason, cleats run more narrow than any other shoe on the face of the planet.) and then promptly called the prosthetics office.

Why the prosthetics office? Easy. I wasn’t sure a) what kind of shin guards would work with AFOs and b) if there was a way to make them so they fit just perfectly and don’t impede the running he’s going to need to do.
After talking to the prosthetician who made Isaac’s AFOs, he had us make an appointment for today, and he’s going to modify the shin guards and check the cleats and the AFO’s. YAY!

What does he want for all of this?

Just a photo of the shrimper running the wrong way down the turf.

Ok. I can get behind that.

August 31, 2009 at 10:44 am Leave a comment

It’s so quiet in the house-or how I got my Mom to eat eel.

This week has been unremarkable in many ways here in Chez E. Nowhere. The guys have been in Arizona visiting the outlaws. As always, I’m not invited. I’m not sad about that at all. Nope. Not at all. So, my life has gone on as always, working and dong what I normally do.

Since cooking for one is kind of insane, my parents have had me over for dinner the majority of the time that the guys have been gone.

Last night, we went out for Asian food at this awesome Pan Asian place by one of the local malls. They serve pretty much all sorts of stuff, including a favorite of mine, sushi. Mom and Dad (ok, just Dad) didn’t really flinch when I ordered up sushi for us to share. Mom-well, she looked at me like I had 20 heads. That’s par for the course around here, so I took it in stride as always.

I ordered two rolls for everyone to share as they saw fit-a tropical roll (crab, cucumber and whitefish and shrimp on the outside topped with black roe, and a mango sauce…oh, yum!) and an eel roll.

With ordering those, and the miso soup that had just shown up, I was in Asiorican heaven.

The sushi shows up,and I offer the eel around. Dad takes some, declares it yummy. Mom sits there and stares at it…and me. Then she proceeds to roll her eyes at me as I’m just having this blissed out moment eating eel.

I offer Mom part of the tropical roll, and she refuses, because of the fish roe on top..even though it’s just a little pinch! It’s awesome, but she declines…then, I offered her the eel.

I got the “Mom look.”

I expected that.

I kept remiding her that the eel was COOKED and it was yummy and she should SO try it. Dad kept telling her the eel was yummy…and she should try it.

So, after me telling her to just dip it in her soy sauce and go for it, Mom picked up a piece of eel roll.

and proceded to commit sushi blasphemy. She started to DISMANTLE THE ROLL and cut it with a knife in an attempt to be dainty.

Yeah, sushi’s not about being dainty. It’s about the FLAVOR! You can’t dismantle a roll because if you do, you lose what makes the entire thing special. Each piece is bite sized and all of the flavors are carefully constructed! Yesh!

But Mom liked eel. Even though she may tell you otherwise…she liked the eel. She had 2 chunks.

So, wonder if the next time the boys are out of town I can get her to try sea urchin. One never knows.

August 26, 2009 at 3:44 pm Leave a comment

The bed fiasco-You’re really calling me?

Today, we finally got someone out here to look at/fix the broken bed that has been sitting in my house for just about a week now.

So, repair guy shows up, and as I’m explaining the entire thing to him, he was quite preoccupied with the fact that Doug had stashed the bolts somewhere that I didn’t know.

Umm, dude-the bolts and bolt holders were STRIPPED! STRIPPED I tell you! Like those would have been any use to him. Whatever.

So, he has to go back to the store to get bolts. he was quite annoyed. I don’t care.

The long and short of his visit is this:

1) The bed is now fixed and back in Isaac’s room.

2) I got confirmation that the bed was put together improperly in the first place, or this never would have happened. THEY assembled it, not us, so the blame lies squarely with them.

3) We should have had a bunky board all along to cover the slats on the platform bed-for support and protection.

So, I dive into the shower because I was getting ready to go out. While I’m in the shower, I hear the phone ring. I totally ignore it. Whoever it is can leave a message. I’d already heard from the boys in Arizona today, so I knew it wasn’t them.

Turns out it was the bitchy customer care coordinator who shares my name playing like she has NO CLUE about today’s visit.

She said:
“Our tech came and assembled your bed..”

No. The tech did NOT assemble the bed. He FIXED the bed. WITHOUT your help. Cripes. I had to go to her supervisor to get someone out here.

She wants a return phone call. Maybe I’ll make someone else do it. I don’t know if I can make this call with a straight face and a polite demeanor. This has been too much of a fiasco.

August 25, 2009 at 12:22 am Leave a comment

The broken bed escapade-Let’s just escalate this one up the chain.

After the snippy conversation with the woman who shares my name, and her unwillingness to do anything for me…and the wonderful manager at the store branch who got Isaac off the floor, I decided to call the next day and see what I could accomplish by contacting that awful woman’s supervisor.

So, Against my better judgement and with witnesses…that’s important. I needed witnesses! I called the furniture store again. Asked for the woman who share’s my name’s supervisor.

Got her.

Told her the entire story-top to bottom. When I told her the part about the bed collapsing with my darling 5 year old ON it, I heard her jaw hit her desk. She asked the question that the evil one didn’t ask-was Isaac ok?

Yes, he’s fine. But the bed…not so much.


I explained the conversation with James, the one with the evil woman who she supervises and how wonderful the store manager got Isaac off of the floor with a bunky board and a metal frame. I told her I knew, knew, knew that they needed someone to look at the bed, and that would be just fine with me. I just needed to schedule it. I gave her my best days and times,and said if it had to be the following week, that was ok too. He’s got a bed. This can hold for a smidge if it needs to.


So, the supervisor gets her tech to call us and he’s coming on Monday. I’m all for it. He wanted to come at 7:30 am on Thursday, but umm. No. Not getting out of bed that early for a furniture tech. Nope. Nope, Nope.


So, another step away from the EECB that I am carefully crafting and doccumenting things for. Both the supervisor AND store manager are in safe mode right now.


Wonder how far I’m going to have to escalate this…

August 22, 2009 at 4:45 pm Leave a comment

Sorry, I don’t take Avon catalogs from strangers

Doug, Isaac and I were at a local grocery store today after lunch. We decided to return some bottles and get some hot dog buns. As we’re walking toward the store through the parking lot, a dark minivan slows down and asks a woman with her daughter in her arms (obviously asleep) a question and then waits for me to walk by.

I have Isaac in one hand, a bag of bottles in the  other.

The minivan is still sitting there. As I pass it by, a woman in the front seat says:

“Would you like an Avon catalog?”



I politely declined the offer, and walked stunned into the store.


August 21, 2009 at 3:46 am Leave a comment

Customer service = Epic Fail.

Since the bed fiasco of last night,  I had to deal with the “Customer Care Coordinator” of this specific furniture company.  Which furniture company you ask? I’m not telling right now. The only thing that’s saving me from naming this company publicly is the fact that the store manager of the store I contacted last night is on my side in this disaster. This is extremely important. Remember that.

So, this morning,  I make a call to the customer service desk as soon as their machine would let me. I get attitude from the initial person who I spoke to. She said “I called both numbers you gave me. You didn’t get my message?”

Umm..I forgot my cell phone. Whoopsie. Happens.

I attempted to explain the situation and told her that we were looking for a replacement for this bed that so epically failed last night. The bed was unusable, and was currently in pieces in our hallway. Isaac is currently sleeping on the floor with his mattress. (the kid is still as odd as fish. He thinks it’s great. Wacky kid) She then said her technician would be out to the house between 2 and 4 pm. Oh, not so good. Working until 3:30. No one there to meet technician to see unsalvagable bed.

This is where the failure begins to become epic. Hardcore epic.

The Customer care manager begins to argue with me over the timing of the technician coming to see the unsalvagable bed. She gets nastier and nastier with me, each time I tell her that this is just not working for me. She even went so far as to ask if I could call someone to see if they could meet the tech at the house and let him in for her. No. sorry. Not happening.

So, since I was working for some friends of mine, I had very limited phone access. Cripes. It’s a cafe. I called her when I could. She was quite irritated by that. She really expects me to call when I’m up to my elbows in salads or sandwiches? Yeah, no. I called her back, and she said the tech wanted to be there at 2:30. I very politely told her that 3:30 was the absolute earliest we could do it, and that was even pushing it, as I had to get home from where I was working. Without traffic, that takes a good 20-30 minutes. With traffic, all bets were off.

This was when she got nasty with me. She argued that since the bed was out of warranty, there would be additional costs.

Umm, excuse me? A product that falls apart? No, I’m not paying for anything extra here.

She then informed me, very snippily, that she was going to charge me for the tech’s time, labor and any associated costs with the visit. If the bed was in irreparable shape, we would be purchasing some sort of new bed. Any sort of replacement was “Out of the question.”  Even a metal frame and something to put the mattress on was out of the question, because she said “you will be required to purchase a box spring and metal frame”, although the store manager at the one store said….wait. we’ll get there in a minute.

The biggest line here was “Look, Laura, I’m TRYING to HELP you.”

Yeah, no, you’re not. My 5 year old nearly falls through a bed that’s failing, horridly, and now he’s sleeping on the floor, and you’re trying to help me by refusing to accomodate my work schedule and then have the nerve to tell me that I’m going to have to pay for this tech visit…and you’re helping me HOW??

So, I end the conversation, because if I didn’t, I would have lost my job (Ok, no I wouldn’t have, but the things I was about to say were NSFW.) and finished my day in a slightly foul mood.

I get home and start playing back the messages.

Holy Crap. There’s one from the manager of the store I contacted last night…Mike, saying that he really didn’t want Isaac sleeping on the floor tonight, so he had the frame and board that we discussed all ready to go, and when the tech came, he could bring it out.

WELL, since we cancelled the tech, I gave him a ring at his store. Near tears, I recounted the day’s events with the Customer care coordinator, who unfortunately, shares her first name with me. I even told him how she demanded I pay for the metal frame and anything associated with it. He refused to hear any of it and was appalled by her behavior, telling me that he would go to HER boss if need be.

did I mention I like this guy? Did I also mention he’s the only one saving this company from an executive email carpet bomb?

So, Mike lets me know that the frame and the board (because we don’t have a box spring for Isaac, due to the fact this was a platform bed) are at the store closest to me, and we can pick it up before 7 tonight. Ok. cool beans. He also let me know that I would NOT have to pay for the technician to come out and look at the epic fail of a bed that is now sitting in pieces in my hallway. He also said multiple times that he is going to make it right with us for this whole disaster, and that he would reiterate to the woman who shares my name at the customer service center what the lifetime service guarantee is and that it means NOT to charge for a technician visit.

We’ll see where we go from here. I’m not too keen on talking to her again…but whatever. We’ll see. We’ll see.

August 18, 2009 at 10:40 pm Leave a comment

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